The image is taken from Google and edited.
I stare into the daylight
as the sun smiles glorious,
faint hope blooms to my delight.
I reach for the galaxy,
stretching to touch the starlight.
Clouds snowed on my fantasy,
turning me numb with frostbite.
It must be my delusion;
Life, I know is a tutor.
Yet remains the confusion.
So I ask, where lies future?
Trying out a new poetry style called the Ae Freislighe. (It's an Irish style of poetry.)
I really appreciated how closely these rhymes worked. English is so hard to fit into this form, and you found words that worked surprisingly well.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Asha. :)
DeleteI'm glad the effort is worth it.
You're so brave to attempt the poetry and you pulled it off really well! I love the line "clouds snowed on my fantasy"
ReplyDeleteThank you very much :)
DeleteReally nice imagery throughout. The fantasy snow and tangible galaxies made for cool scenes in my head as I was reading. I thought maybe a few lines could be tweaked here and there. For example, "Where lies future?" had me inserting "the" in it. I couldn't figure out why the article was missing, except to hit the syllable count.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Nathan. It was exactly to hit the syllable count. It was the best I came up with at that time. :)
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